


Ken's Epic Adventure! (Totally No Sarcasm)

by MehEds



Category: Sword Art Online
Genre: Funny, Mary Sue, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-11
Updated: 2015-04-11
Packaged: 2018-03-22 08:27:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3722050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MehEds/pseuds/MehEds
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When a ten-year old sounding teenager gets crapped in the world of Sword Art Online, he messes up everyone's lives. So it's up to Kirito, Klein, and Akihiko Kayaba to fix it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ken's Epic Adventure! (Totally No Sarcasm)

 

_AU:This is set in a author’s world where plot just stops on it’s tracks, to make way for this extremely poor substitute. This will take place before the seventy-fourth floor boss, and I will go through the Heathcliff fight in the arena, but that is the one only exception. Also, I don’t own Sword Art Online. Major Spoilers Ahead._

Kirito ran on the dungeon, accompanied by Asuna, and Klein, to save that Aincrad Liberation Force. Or was it Army? Kirito wasn’t sure. Just that they had to save them.

Only to stop, and find out that some other dude took care of it. 

The soldiers all patted him on the back, but even through the compliments, he was modest. And caring. 

Which was pretty hard to tell considering Kirito and that other dude was fifty feet away. But they detected that, somehow, and they ran to find out whoever the hell he is. 

He has long bright white hair, and a white cloak. He has slender features, and he has perfect shimmering green eyes, that was packed top to bottom with bishie sparkle. All the sparkle. In fact, if you skimmed through that last sentence, you’d probably think he’s a woman. 

But he wasn’t.

‘Cause _somehow_ , he also had an aura of badassery. Even the author’s spellcheck thought that word was dorky. Perhaps it was from the dual swords- 

_Wait_ , Kirito thought. _I thought I was the only one that had that!_

Kirito suddenly became more excited to meet him. When they reached them, Asuna suddenly hugged him. Kirito just _had_ to raise an eyebrow. Klein followed suit. But he still continued. 

“Hey! Did you get a skill six months ago?” Kirito asked all OOC-like. The man-girl grinned at him. “When I logged in yesterday, I had a list of skills to pick.Dual Blades was the coolest one! I assumed that was to create my class! By the way, name’s Ken!” He responded in a extremely soft, bishie-like voice, reminiscent of English dubs (shudder). Kirito immediately checked his profile.

No Dual Blades.

All that grinding to completion; gone. 

Kirito suddenly death-glared at him. That was not fair. What _god_ gave Ken the ability to bend the rules? 

Kirito started to march right at him. When they stood face to face, Kirito found out that he wore the same long coat he wore, except it was white, and he had a bandolier of throwing knives, and the dual swords were actually katanas.

Katanas were different from normal swords. They cannot be dual wielded. 

Until _this_ guy came. They were of equal height. Kirito started to barrage him with questions. 

“What’s your Dual Blades skill level?”

“Completed,” 

“One-Handed Sword?” 

“Completed,”

“Knife Throwing?” 

“Completed,” 

“One Handed Curved Sword?” 

“Battle Healing?!” Kirito expectantly waited for him to check his stats. Ken thought it was completed, but modest as ever, he checked. 

“…Completed.” 

Kirito felt his jaw drop to Floor 1. “That, is, impossible. My completed skills are One Handed Sword, and I achieved that at Floor 50,” Kirito recalled his Dual Blades grinding sessions, to boost it up to completion. Ken _punched_ that hard work in the face. Asuna started to strut forward, an angry tsundere look on her face. “Leave him alone! He got bullied in school!” She scorned him. 

She was seriously considering sleep PK-ing the boy. Kirito raised an eyebrow.

“Was that for the fact that he has a voice for a ten-year old? “ Kirito said bluntly. 

Klein was the only dude who laughed. The Aincrad Liberation Force/Army just stared at him. Asuna started to tear up, because she felt Ken’s feelings, despite only meeting him a minute ago, and having met Kirito for at least a year. Ken started to look depressed, suddenly turning angsty at a moment’s notice.

“No one understands me!” Ken sobbed, and ran to the seventy-fifth floor. Asuna started running after him, but Ken was faster, than Asuna, the fastest player ‘till now, because Ken did cross-country in real life. Kirito face palmed. The Aincrad Liberation whatever started to look at Kirito with murderous intent. 

How dare he _defiles_ their saviour! Kirito started to back up.

Crap.

Kirito fortunately, just scared them off. Without Ken to lead them, they’re just lost sheep. Kirito’s harem female friends, heard the news and joined Ken’s harem.(It’s a harem, no excuses.), leaving Klein and his _extremely_ badass guild (None of his guild members died. Can’t say the same for Kirito.). 

“Klein, I swear, I had the Dual Blades skill before him. I can even name the skills!” Kirito tried to convince him. 

“Prove it.” Kirito fidgeted with his fingers. 

“I can’t really prove it.” He admitted.

“But don’t you think that’s weird. He’s so accomplished, but I didn’t even hear anything about him before. And there’s no ‘class selection’ in this game!” Klein stroked his chin.

“I guess so. Alright. I’ll help you. First, I have to go to the Knights of the Blood Oath HQ. There’s a fight there, with Ken- Kirito?” Kirito instantly teleported to the fight. 

The arena was packed. Apparently, Ken is battling the leader so Asuna can have some time off. Kirito felt a sense of déjà vu, then analyzed the situation. Heathcliff was extremely powerful. However, so was Ken. Just that Heathcliff actually earned respect. (Even if he cheated a lot, at least he logged more than ten minutes of playtime). The duel started. Ken dashed forward, and started calling his attacks. Which is why Heathcliff blocked everything. (It’s only logical). And then, Ken leaped back ten feet, and started to throw as much knives as he can. So, Heathcliff pretty much ducked behind his shield.

Meanwhile, Ken pretty much covered every anime combat stereotype ever. Then, Ken ran out of knives, and started to sprint at him, jump off Heathcliff’s shield as he was blocking, and, Ken, started to dive into Heathcliff, spinning like a corkscrew. 

“CORKSCREW STARBLAST ATTACK!!” Ken yelled all the way to the ground. Heathcliff raised his shield, but Ken, broke it. And managed to bump Heathcliff’s HP to the red zone. 

And Klein finally experienced the epic Floor One Jaw Drop. Heathcliff had a look of destroyed pride in his face. Heathcliff stared at Ken, right now posing with a ridiculously corny thumbs up. Heathcliff saw Kirito, and started to go towards him. Kirito started to recognize that, and started to do the same. “I _swear_ , I thought I gave you the Dual Blades skill!” He muttered. “What?” Kirito was surprised. Heathcliff started to whisper on his ear. “

I’m Akihiko Kaya-“

“WHAT?!!”

“-ba.” Kayaba facepalmed. Kirito became all suicidal hero. He took out Elucidator, and started to point at him. 

“I challenge you-“ Then Kayaba started to cover Kirito’s mouth. “Listen! We should work together! Ken’s not even in the game at Floor One!” Kirito started to calm down, from the initial shock.

“Right. Let’s find out where he’s from.” They told Klein. He actually suspected it, since his shield was nigh-indestructible. He was cool with it, but not after trying to thrash Kayaba.

“Alright, let’s list out his attributes.” Kayaba decided. 

“He has my Dual Blades skill, broke your shield-“

“It came with the sword too,” Kayaba muttered.

“-and can attract girls really easily.” Klein started to grin. 

“Just like you, Kirito!”

“What? I didn’t fight Akihiko?”

“No, the other one,” Kirito suddenly reddened up. 

“Wha? No, I always had to- shut up.” Kirito groaned. Then decided to change the subject quickly. “Kayaba, can’t you kick him out? It’s a MMO. You should be able t-“ Kayaba looked down, ashamed of his poor security. Kirito scratched his head. 

“O…Kay. Could you at least give Dual Blades back?” Kirito asked excitedly. No matter his emotional state, Kirito is a teenager. And he thought Dual Blades were friggin epic. Akihiko shook his head.

“It can only belong to one person.” Klein groaned out of frustration. Kirito looked him puzzled.

“What?” 

“I wanted to have Dual Blades too,” he whimpered. Kirito nodded. He can respect that. He looked at Kayaba. 

“Tell me how to fight against him.”


End file.
